wellbeing: why you may have self care all wrong.

I used to think that self care was some cheesy thing that people decided to capitalise on in the online space.

So, along with many of my friends, we would schedule some self-care time daily and even weekly. We would drink 8 glasses of water, practice yoga, have regular facials and days off, all in the name of ‘self care’.

A few years has passed since I held self-care in those regards. I have had a son, finished my Law Degree,  juggled having a baby/ business/ 9-5 job, and left my job to become a full time mum and part time business. 

I have realised in that time, self care is not something you buy, nor something you are told to do, it’s actually something more spiritual than physical. It’s more of a spiritual awakening than a physical act. 

It’s not about what you do, it’s all about WHO YOU BECOME.

Self care is not a DOING thing, it is BEING thing.

And despite those many posts I still see, I am not against doing things to feel good, I am not opposed to what another believes. I am merely sharing what I have found true for me here.

Self care stems from self love, and even all those years ago when I tried to schedule self care and successfully managed to week after week, it didn’t actually change anything. It didn’t change my fundamental unconscious issues, of not feeling worthy enough. 

My belief has since changed toward what good self care is for me, self care IS NOT:

- A checklist to tick off.

- A book haul.

- A day at the spa.

- Practicing yoga/ meditating daily.

Self care is not those things. Self care is something independent to ALL of those things, self care fundamentally stems from SELF LOVE. So, when self love is in order, EVERY thing you do is a choice based upon that loving acceptance of yourself. 

When you love yourself, fully, self care is not a ’thing’ to be added and scheduled into your life, you automatically do things that are naturally loving and kind for yourself daily. You make conscious and loving choices, you draw boundaries that are appreciative of your core essence, and you stand by your own truth with every action and in-action. When you love yourself every act becomes a an expression of that love. 

Written by Sarah Marie Liddle